A $20 quit-smoking app that expects the bad choice. It learns when your smoke breaks are
and checks in at each one: did you, or did you skip it? Every check-in comes with a card showing
where that habit can lead: the money, the hospital, the people. Not a treatment. No promises.
$20. Once. No subscription. No free tier. 14-day refund.
SEE WHAT YOUR SMOKES COSTCheckout opens soon. The cost calculator is free, takes 30 seconds, and nothing you type leaves your phone.
10:41▮▮▮ ◔
MY LAST SMOKE BREAKnowAbout time for your smoke break. Did you? Or did you skip this one?
Your check-in card: where this habit can lead
You complain at every gas pump. Then you go inside and spend almost as much on the pack.
Real cards from the deck. Hover to hold one.
How it works
Tell it how many you smoke a day.
Around your usual smoke breaks, it checks in: did you, or did you skip it?
Each check-in shows you a card: where this habit can lead. The bills. The hospital bed. The people.
Your breaks go down over time, at a pace you pick, and you see every dollar you didn't burn.
Not medical care. No promises.
Go ahead. Tap it.
This is the screen. It's 10:41, which is usually when you'd be out back. So it asks.
Tap I SMOKED or I'M GOOD and it deals you a card from the real deck. Scroll it like the real thing.
Demo. Nothing you tap here leaves this page.
10:41▮▮▮ ◔
Dept. of Lost Causes • Form 1970
YOUR LUNGS & YOU
my last smoke break!!
Day 12
3OF 11
smoked today · 11 breaks on today's schedule
About time for your smoke break. Did you?Or did you skip this one?
Skipped today: 1 · Smoked today: 3
Your check-in card: where this habit can lead
$1.50spent today
$27.50spent this week
$61.00spent since day 1
Your usual smoke breaks todayskipped: 1
Demo numbers: a pack-a-day smoker, $10 a pack.
Every other quit app claps when you open it. Streaks. Badges. A little tree that grows.
You've tried them. You're still smoking. This one works the other way.
"Good news — they finance. You've already put $2,340 down."
Tried everything else? Good.
Patient History — Prior Attempts Form 1970-A
The patch$289
The gum$164
Vaping ("just to quit")$412
Cold turkey, every New Year's×6
The hypnosis download$60
The app with the little tree$9.99/mo
Total spent quittingstill smoking
IRRELEVANT
This app doesn't care what you tried, how many times you tried, or how much you
spent on quit products. There's no case history held against you here. The buddy
doesn't read the file — he reads you, starting today.
Because here's the thing about having tried everything: it means you're actually ready.
And when you're actually ready, you don't need another program, another plan, another tree.
You may just need a nudge — somebody putting the possible outcomes in front of you,
in full color, until one of them lands. That's the whole job. Exhibits below.
You set your number and how many days to cut down to zero. It sets the pace — hard cuts early, when you've still got the fight in you.
It learns when your smoke breaks happen, shows up at each one, and asks: did you, or did you skip it? Skip one, hit "I'M GOOD", and your skip count climbs. That number becomes the story you tell.
Smoke early? It knows. Smoke extra? It knows that too, and it has opinions.
Go past your number and open the app — it meets you at the door with a picture you'd rather not see and a line you deserve.
A private count of the breaks you skipped. Nothing rides on it. No badges. No cheering. No little tree.
No subscription. No "premium insights." No selling your data to anybody.
"Pickled. Labeled. Yours are free-range, for now."
"Your retirement plan called. This is it."
"Even he's disgusted, and he licks his own ass."
⚠ Official Notice to Vapers ⚠
Trying to quit vaping? Grow up. We can't help you.
This establishment serves cigarette smokers — people who started back
when you could smoke in a Denny's. When you're ready to admit the raspberry cloud
was a lateral move, not a quit… the door's over there.
Yes, it's the two from the videos
Same voices. Same manners. They show up in the real world for fifteen seconds at a time on
TikTok, then live in your notifications while you quit. Pick which one runs your file.
THE CLERKDept. of Lost Causes. Hearse driver, repo man, oxygen delivery. He's not mad. He's counting.
DARLENENail tech, stylist, crossing guard. Calls you sugar right before she says the thing.
Every card in the app is one of these scenes, shown at your check-ins.
The method: cut down a little at a time, with a card at each check-in
My Last Smoke Break is a quit-smoking app that expects the bad choice. You start
at your real number, the number of cigarettes you smoke now, and it cuts that number over time, at a
pace you pick: hard early, when you've still got the fight in you, gently late. It is not cold
turkey, and it is not a treatment. How long it takes is up to you, and there are no promises.
It learns when you smoke. After a few days of logging, the app knows roughly
when your smoke breaks happen. Around those times it checks in (did you, or did you skip it?)
and shows a card of where that habit can lead: a picture and a sentence you would rather not see.
The money, the hospital, the people. Smoke one anyway? Press I SMOKED. That is
a button, not a failure, and the plan keeps going.
No praise, no badges. A private count of the breaks you skipped, with nothing
riding on it. No coach to disappoint. The only score is the number of smoke breaks you skipped.
Does cutting down first even work? Cutting down first works as
well as cold turkey, according to a 2019 Cochrane review of 51 trials and 22,509 people
(Lindson et al., CD013183).
That review is about the method, not about this app. It worked best with support, so if you
use patches, gum or a prescription, keep using them. This app is not a replacement for any of them.
Questions people ask before they pay
What is My Last Smoke Break?
My Last Smoke Break is a quit-smoking app that expects the bad choice. It learns when your smoke breaks are, checks in at each one (did you, or did you skip it?), and shows a card of where that habit can lead. It cuts your daily number over time at a pace you pick. $20, once. Not a treatment.
Is there a quit-smoking app without a subscription?
Yes. My Last Smoke Break is $20, once. No trial, no renewal, no premium tier, and no free tier. Most quit-smoking apps charge weekly, monthly or yearly; the prices we checked are in the table on this page, with the date we checked them.
Is this a medical treatment?
No. It is a quit-smoking app with a bad attitude, not medical care. If you have a heart condition, are pregnant, or take medication, talk to a doctor about quitting first. The app will still be rude to you afterward.
Does it work?
We don't publish a success rate, and you should be suspicious of any quit product that does. What it does: it learns your smoke times, checks in at each one, shows a card of where that habit can lead, and cuts the number over time at a pace you pick. Whether you skip the smoke is on you, and there are no promises.
Do I have to quit cold turkey?
No. It cuts down a little at a time (a taper): you start at your real number and it cuts it over time, at a pace you pick. Cutting down first works as well as cold turkey, according to a 2019 Cochrane review of 51 trials (Lindson et al., CD013183).
What happens if I smoke one anyway?
You press I SMOKED. That is a button, not a failure. The app logs it, says something about it, and the plan keeps going. Nothing resets.
How much does smoking cost a year?
A pack a day at $10.15 a pack, the 2026 US average, is about $3,705 a year. Put in your own numbers in the free calculator at mylastsmokebreak.com/math. Nothing you type leaves your phone.
Why is it mean?
Because kindness has had thirty years and a hundred apps. Most smokers already know every fact. What they lack is somebody in the room at 2:15 who says it out loud. You opt into the tone when you sign up, and you can turn it down to standard.
Why not free?
Free apps get installed and ignored. Twenty bucks is less than a carton, and paying for it is the first thing you do differently.
Does it work for vaping?
No. It is built for cigarette smokers.
Android or iPhone?
Both, right now, as a web app you add to your home screen. Notifications work on Android and on iPhone with iOS 16.4 or newer once installed. A Google Play listing is coming.
What do you do with my data?
Nothing interesting. Your smoke times and answers stay on our server and are never sold. You can delete your account from Settings in the app any time (password, then type DELETE).
Why I built it
Thirty years of heavy drinking put me in a hospital bed. I got out, and in December 2023 I quit —
alone, living out of an RV with my dog.
No coach. No app with a tree in it. Coming up on three years sober now.
The cigarettes were supposed to be next. I tried what you've tried — the patches, the gum,
the apps that congratulate you for opening them. None of it stuck, because none of it talked to me
like the truth talks. What finally moved me was the opposite of encouragement: the math of what
it costs, the picture of where it ends, and somebody willing to say it to my face.
So I built the somebody. This app is the friend who's got dirt on you — the one who says
"really, bro?" when you light number sixteen. It's not medical advice.
It's not a program from a lab. It's what's working on me, one rude notification at a time,
and I figured I'm not the only one who needed it said this way.
Paid from day one. Twenty bucks, one time. Not a month.
Not a "free trial" with your card number held hostage. No free tier, because
free is how the other apps get ignored. Less than a carton, even where your state robs
you least.
Never a subscription. Quitting is the one product you should need less of.
Checkout opens soon. Until then the cost calculator is the free part.
Works on any phone, right in the browser — open the app and use
"Add to Home Screen" to install it. No store needed yet.
Form 1970-F • iPhone Owners
Safari won't let a website nag you. An installed app can. Three taps once you're in:
Tap Share at the bottom of Safari
Tap Add to Home Screen, then Add
Open it from the icon, then turn on notifications
Not from Safari, not from a bookmark. From the icon. iOS 16.4 or newer.
This pamphlet is not sympathetic. Side effects of quitting include: money, spare time, and a clerk who
won't stop talking.
Not medical advice, and not a treatment. One stubborn case built it for himself first. 18+ for language.
Your data is yours. Delete your account any time: it's deleted right away, and backup copies age out within 30 days.
THE CLERK
DARLENE
